Happy Birthday Lucas...

And so tonight I talk to "Mom" Pfeiff on the way home...she tells me today was Lucas' birthday...And I think of how my morning started...an early morning...just seemed to need time at the kitchen table.   There seemed to be different things making me think of life...of death...and I go to look tonight for a picture of Lucas...and I know I have some but can't find them tonight but instead I find a writing I had from a year ago...and so I change the age...because it was one I thought I would share...though I go through and edit his age...and add thoughts to intermingle with these words...

Lucas’ birthday…he would be 37…though it just seems yesterday…he would have been 18.   Just yesterday…a life taken way to soon it seems.    Lucas was one of those with a perhaps not full out fire  yet but definitely a spark.   He just had that little grin that could warm your heart.    I did not spend as much time with Luke…I’m sure we all think that.   The youngest of three brothers…Brothers.    And there is a song that always makes me think of Lucas.   And I wonder who you’d be today.   Grandma and I talked about that today...you wonder...what if...a question I ask often...

 

And I thought of that when your aunt saying how old you would be.   Thirty seven years…and that is hard for me to imagine as we seem to just leave a person at the last age we seen them last…Whether they have left this life or not...  

I have pondered why is that those that leave us we usually only remember their good qualities and if there was qualities that drove us crazy we still make them endearing…and perhaps that is a gift…much like how you can remember your childhood.     You can either make it a miserable existence…or you just remember the good parts and think life was good then!    My heart thinks of you Lucas as I sit here at my kitchen table…and my thoughts and prayers go for your mom…your brothers…all your family and friends that misses you still.    I stop and give respect and think I would have liked to have known you more…you were a special one Lucas…you were a special one!

I put in a picture that I found...I know Brian will not love this one...but I remember this day...Brian's 8th grade graduation...Brian living with us at the time...but the brother's together...

 

Oh Lucas...so dang cute...I think of Tate's baby Rigen  not a baby anymore...close to the age you were Luke and something of him makes me think of Lucas...perhaps the grin...and I think of the sunrise and the sunsets today...both of which saying a special day.   I read about how Aaron Watson had not written of the loss of his daughter...not to make others sad but to remind how precious life is.    And also to stop and remember you Luke...that you are special to us...

And so I think of the sunsets...one I caught as I was headed up the road...distractions and shadows...darkness...but at the end of the road light...and I wonder what verse I should add...and I think of course it should come from Luke...and so I include on the picture...one of the verses that speaks to me...

 

Peace to those who walk this road of life...Thinking of Lucas on his birthday...left us much too soon...

Love,

Aunt Penny