Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Giving my arms a break and my life a memory...

A while since I have written...but this one kept calling me...and so I write...

This weekend...one of those as the Firecracker and I discussed of a blue dragonfly she seen and as she always asks me...I ask if she got a picture of it and she said yes...and she said in my mind...to which I told her I take those too...the kind you put in your mind and keep in your heart.

First grade and she starting in a new school...her and I packing her toys...changes...but for the weekend...just time together.   I went up Saturday morning and upon arriving she says, "Ahma, are you spending the night?"   To which I reply that I am.   She says, "Good I will sleep with you and stay up late!"   She will tell me this at times...but usually changes her mind...

We had lunch at Ruby's...meeting up with Uncle LaLa as he passed through Limon heading south...and Izzy telling me she will have the same-o same-o...but wondering if the new waitress will know what the same o same o is...and these moments that we take in as the same-o same-o to realize what precious times they are...but do not remain the same...But Ruby coming out and asking her if she is going to college cause she seen she was up by Fort Collins going to school...to which that little toothless grin appears...

Supper at the IHop with Grammy and Grandad...and remember Grammy saying she not having the same-o...same-o...something new she says!

 And then back to the house...the Firecracker and I on the couch to watch Mulan...her mom turning in and we a little later...and upon getting in bed...we listen to Let it Go...then off to dreamland.   I laying there with the full moon lighting the world it seems...and thinking of memories in the old house...of watching a Firecracker sleep....of her mama and her daddy...I can close my eyes and this little one sleeping I can picture holding as a babe...and wonder where does the time go...and a prayer or two...and I think of talking to her mama on the phone a few days before and seen an awesome big butterfly landing on the sunflower...and I think how we cannot stay in our cocoons forever...we must fly...

The next morning playing Cootie with this Cutie...as she waited for Grammy and Grandad to go to church...lunch at the Southside with LaLa and Oppy...and think of a picture of Izzy dancing with her daddy at the Southside..   And then the words that made me write this...As Izzy on her swing from Mike and Liz...she having me push her...in her Sunday dress...no shoes...and she lets go of the rope falling back into my arms laughing and tells me..."Gving my arms a break and my life a memory...of laughing with you."     I make a note of it as those words just speak to me...and how it seems to be a statement of faith in the purest form!   How we should take those moments and just breathe them in...and I take that picture in my heart as her little toothless smile and those big blue eyes stare right into mine...an I am overwhelmed with how blessed I am to have this precious gift of God!   And so I snap a picture a little later...but not quite the same....

We sit on the old porch swing and talk of butterflies (one flew in the house and then back out again) and dragonflies...of heaven and who is there...wondering if my dad and mom and her dad are playing cards together...

I awaken this morning and have the song Because He Lives...playing in my mind to later find that my friend Katie shared it to be a reminder of the words...and I find a version by the David Crowder Band...

And I read Jesus Calling by Sarah Young for the day...and it just seems to go with this...of giving our arms a break...
"GROW STRONG IN YOUR WEAKNESS.  Some of My children I've gifted with abundant strength and stamina.  Others, like you, have received the humble gift of frailty.  Your fragility is not a punishment, nor does it indicate lack of faith.  On the contrary, weak ones like you must live by faith, depending on Me to get you through the day.  I am developing your ability to trust Me, to lean on Me, rather than on your understanding.  Your natural preference is to plan out your day, knowing what will happen when.  My preference is for you to depend on Me continually, trusting Me to guide you and strengthen you as needed.   This is how you grow strong in your weakness."  

And the verses that accompany seem to speak right out loud as well...as I wonder what is on the road ahead...not just letting go...giving my arms a break...

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit”;   whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.  Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.”  
James 4:13-15

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
Proverbs 3:5
Have you not known?
Have you not heard?
The everlasting God, the Lord,
The Creator of the ends of the earth,
Neither faints nor is weary.
His understanding is unsearchable.
29 He gives power to the weak,
And to those who have no might He increases strength.
30 Even the youths shall faint and be weary,
And the young men shall utterly fall,
31 But those who wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40:28-31

Wings like eagles...each of these verses speaking to me...and I picture myself as I seen one little Izzy Bell...in complete just resting in His arms and giving my arms a break and my life a memory...and I hear later in the day today a song that Izzy's other Grammy and I both love and we love that it is sang by Iz...and I think someday over the rainbow...and I give thanks..for one little Iz...and for the blessing I am surrounded with...

So LORD I give this simple prayer...that I may rest in Your arms...giving my arms a break...and my life a memory...


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