It's the least I could do...

 Sometimes in the early morning hours I lay there...part in sleep...part awake...in and out of prayer...many thoughts going through my mind...this morning was one of those mornings...the saying, "It is the least I can do".   Which put my mind in thought...of how often...this is the path I take...the least I can do instead of the "most" I can do.   Perhaps sometimes these are one and the same...yet usually they are not.

As of late, I have been touched by the loss of two special people...one a special friend...the other married to a special friend.    I being sick was unable to go be with them in person...not able to hug and comfort these special people...so I send texts and messages...the least I could do.   Yet I am reminded I also said a prayer which many times is the very most I can do.   

When I thought of this line...I was reminded of a writing in Matthew 25...of people saying when did we see You hungry LORD?  When did we see you thirsty?    And His reply was when you did it to the least of these...sometimes least is more...I a least...you a least...and in this writing it writes this thought two different ways...when you did it and then when you didn't...yet saying the same thing...

Thanksgiving is rapidly approaching...the harvest is upon us...I read more of this writing...these "letters" if you will...of the sheep and the goats...of being prepared with our oil and lamps...of using talents...A lot to think on as I read these words that seem to speak to my soul.

As I write...I listen to Crowder singing, "Get ready...all the stories are true."   These "stories"...these words that have taken life within me...me...the least of these...yet Jesus died for this least of these who shares her story...but it wasn't the least He could do...it was the "MOST" He could do...

TODAY'S FORECAST...Is it the least...or the most I could do?

lyp

Ode to Joy...Ode to Deb...

 I sit here and see I have started a few blogs and have not finished...but today...today I watch a video of "a celebration of life"...and sad that I am not there in person but my heart is there...I receive a text from Denise this morning and so glad she and her beautiful voice could be there...

Debbie Boomer Autry...Eva and Earl's beautiful daughter...wife and adored by Kelly...mama to Trent, Kimbra, and Whitney...grandmother to Zoe and Morgan...but to me...my beautiful friend who could make me laugh so hard...Blessed to know this part of this woman...my mind flashes so many memories friend...

I really not sure when I first met Deb?    I think PTA and Fun Friday's and going through life raising our kids...but then there comes a time you just connect.   It was these moments that the friendship starts...and then just like that...a forever friend...

My life highlight reel of Debbie is full.   Full of laughter, tears, memories...Some pictures I have captured but many just there in my heart.    A favorite was my daughter and I sitting next to her and Kimbra at Sonic...and Debbie with that accent trying to order extra ICE...you know for her Dr. Pepper.  And she is spelling it through the speaker with the other end trying to understand and Debbie getting frustrated.  Heather and I laughing so hard as she says, "ICE, I-C-E"...if you have heard her say it...you know what I am saying.   And I still just start laughing as I hear her saying it...and then can hear her say, "Ya'll are bein ugly!"  

Her "twin brother" my husband another story in and of itself...regarding Olive Garden...dry salmon...a manager coming to check on it only to go to another table and so Deb in her southern voice calling the manager over letting her know it was in fact her salmon that was "dryyyyy".    And she getting a complimentary meal and so Tim starts saying well what about his.   I jokingly tell the manager that they were twins separated at birth...which then the manager believes...and so Deb keeping that straight face just goes with it with a story to tell.   Her eyes twinkling and I of course as usual just laughing uncontrollably.

Her and Denise and I became special friends...I remember a Crowley County days they decide I should run for school board and begin my campaign throwing pennies from the car...my side still hurts from laughing...and with those two on your side...well I made the school board...Mr. Earl sightings...We three the "honky-tonk angels"...I more of the audience laugh track as I didn't wear my bow...watching on as we go to the Alamo Bowl and those two convince someone that they are singing during the Bowl game.    Of Debbie finding a name tag on that trip in which she became "Jane" our tour guide!   Oh one could just wind a little and watch her go.   Many special Friday nights...nights taken for granted that we would be going out to eat or running a concession stand...One of Deb's favorite places...Felisa's...and I find one of the three of us together...a little foggy but the three of us together...

We shared lots of laughter...but also other moments...raising children...weddings...loss of parents...and so much more...Probably a favorite memory was Whitney's wedding in Vegas...I was asked to take pics of before and after wedding...I put together a video...inspired by when we were watching the water fountain.   A fun and happy time...and I say to her family...remember these...

The last time I remember talking to Debbie...we talked of where we were in our lives.   Laughing about there being tents available in Denver and we could be neighbors...I laughing thinking that a homeless community would never be the same with her organizing and motivating everyone...and then a message from Kimbra...to pray and what was going on with her mom...then texting Deb only to get a reply from Kelly saying our girl is sick.   But thinking oh Deb...she always so tough...so alive...she will be better soon!  And then the call...the call that you don't want to get...the call that says she is gone and how you do not know what words to give as comfort because you are hurting yourself...and the tears still fall as I still find it hard to believe...oh my beautiful friend...I so thankful for your friendship.

I often get sights...pictures that remind me of someone...someone who has left...the day after finding of Debbie's passing...I was following my husband to the mechanic...we were traveling slow.   We came by some water that has some amazing views...and the fog was beginning to build and so I held up my phone and clicked...dirty window and all...yet this picture and the fog reminded me of we do not know what lies ahead...and though there is darkness and out of focus...there is more...there is blue skies and because of Jesus...a place called Heaven...and so I came across this verse...that I know my friend has conquered...and the words to "In Christ Alone" I include...

As I was in the shower this morning...this song came to mind...an older song...but we might be a little older...but I think that we share a faith...a love for Jesus...and so I know I will see this beautiful friend again.    I picture her in Heaven...singing away...and I think...friends are friends forever if the Lord's the Lord of them...

So I will see you later my friend...and to your family...I love you all so much and my heart is with you...may you have many moments of laughter...love and prayers...love you my friend!  lyp

Not goodbye...but see you later Dean...

Dear Dean,

Today your birthday…talking with your folks of the day you were born…your mom said it was raining so much and they were trying to get corn planted…and then she said the rain stopped and didn’t come…May 16, 1952.     Here we are 68 years later…and we are working on getting corn in and I am sure it brings back memories for them…

There was to be a celebration of your life today and hard to believe that so much has happened in the short time ago that you went to be with Jesus…and I think of your story.   What a story!   I have heard of becoming a new creation and know it is so…but I seen quite the amazing transformation in you…I seen relationships healed, bonds grown stronger, and you—you changed.   I have scattered verses throughout my Bible that I have written your name…

One place written in my Bible and my heart was John 3:16…”For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son.  That whosoever believeth in Him shall not perish but have Everlasting Life.”  I remember as I had been reading through the 30 days of John…and on this day I was in John 3.    I thinking of trials we had been through…of your boys living with us for part of their lives…and I remember my heart changed…of hearing a voice saying Dean is a “whosoever” as you are a “whosoever”.   So odd that all happened that I read there the day we went to visit you.   You sat there telling stories of different things and as you spoke you began speaking of wanting to hear from God but that He did not speak to you.   I remember you talking of Moses and his stick…and I remember praying that I hoped you heard from Him…

And as time went on…I remember you telling of your story…that you knew God spoke to you…of you never being the same…of us thinking that on that Christmas day we would say goodbye…BUT instead you went and celebrated with your family….God gave us another year plus… I marveled at the change…cancer…it has taken many away yet in many ways it has given stronger relationships…it has made one appreciate that which was taken for granted…and you were given the gift of peace…of love…of hope and of faith and Eternal Life.   There were moments that I will not forget in the journey…and for that I am thankful.  

I think of Kathy and how she stood by your side…and I admire her strength…and her love…and I think of her today as I pull up a picture of you and her…of her loving you since grade school…

 I think of your boys.  I think of Lucas leaving before you and so many emotions I know you all felt…but so thankful you got time with your boys…that I love you’s were said…and Tate and Brian…you hold a special place in my heart and my love is with you as you go through this loss.   You both there when I lost my dad…and I am sorry I couldn’t be with you.

I think of your Mom and Dad…of time you were given with them even though it is never long enough when it is your child.  On the one day we visited and toured I got a picture of you and your folks and Kathy and Tim…but I remember trying to capture the hugs you gave your folks as well…and how you and your Mom just held on.

My last memory of you was the day we moved your folks to come live with us and you came to check it out…and how we got a group picture of all...you next to your sister and the friendship that you two were given…and thinking of you coming and talking to the other Penni and I…and you putting your arm around us and saying my “Pennies”…and little did I know that we would have to let you both go…and though you were struggling…you posed with the group for the picture…a moment captured in time of a season gone by...

 It was at that time…I thought that I might not get to see you on this side again…but knowing in my heart that I would see you on the other side…and one of my favorite verses came up and I thought of you…and the journey you took.     I snapped a picture on the day you passed of the sunset…I was going to pick up my granddaughter and had not made the travels with your family as they tried to get to you but you decided to go on your own time…or actually God’s time…but I must say this moment when I was driving on that day…I could feel your peace.    I added to this picture the verse from Luke 1:79 as it seems so fitting of those last days...

I thank you for the lessons you taught me…for sharing some very Spirit filled moments that I will always remember.  What a journey Dean Pfeiff…and now you are at home with God!   I will see you on the other side…

Love,

Penny

Aspiration

It has been some time since I decided to write here in this blogdom...and though the old kitchen table remains...I have found new places to write...to create...and this morning my kitchen counter I guess you could call it...the bar?  It a place of light and seeing the comings and goings...a happy place...and my view...though not right now...looks out into the field which is now filled with rye and cattle...I love that it has so much green reminding me of spring...

Spring and I think of this new season that is upon us...this unknown territory.   And I watch.   I think of these cows...quarantined if you will.   They fearful to go to new places...though the new places are a safe place.

This morning I given a word...I am not sure why I receive these words though often I figure out...sometimes just to ponder.   But this word--Aspiration.    Now I do not really use this word and not completely certain of the definition which also gives me something to ponder...and so I look it up.  

• 1.a hope or ambition of achieving something:" the yawning gulf between aspiration and reality"
• 2.the action or process of drawing breath.

Both of these seem to hit.   The first as I think of my purpose...I had listened to a man confined to a hospital room with no one to talk to him...and God sent a cleaner...this man had an accent it seemed Irish.  Anyway he gave a testimony and how his life was touched by the man who cleaned the rooms.    I think of how we don't have to touch every life...but if we just touch one life...that a hope...an ambition if you will.    Which brings the next definition of drawing breath...drawing breath...and perhaps it should be with each breath we draw...may we achieve something.   Sometimes it may just be doing that daily thing you do...yet it is achievement.

I had read in Jesus Calling by Sarah Young this morning of: "I have planted Peace in the garden of your heart, where I live; but there are weeds growing there too: pride, worry, selfishness, unbelief.  I am the Gardener, and I am working in various ways.   When you sit quietly with Me, I shine the Light of My Presence directly into your heart.  In this heavenly Light, Peace grows abundantly and weeds shrivel up.   I also send trials into your life.  When you trust Me in the midst of trouble, Peace flourishes and weeds die away."

Tis the season of spring of gardening.   Throwing out those weeds that threaten that which is intended to live abundantly.   I had read verses this morning...in the New King James Version there is usually a title...this one says:  "Seeing the Invisible"...

Therefore we do not lose heart.   Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.   For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen.  For the things which are seen are temporary, but things which are not seen are eternal.   2 Corinthians 4:16-18

This written by Paul and I had read something this morning of Paul who was quarantined...and yet how many people he reached talking of Jesus...his "letters" are cherished writings in the Bible...he did not have the social media platforms we have today...yet he shared the love of Jesus and here I sit at my kitchen "table" reading his words of not losing heart.   

And there are so many things before us that we are missing...longing for...and we are afraid because people can die and I know this is true.   Yet in our life before this season...didn't we do things quite often from which we could die...death something we all will do...they say your chances are 1 in 1.   And I do not try to make light of what is before us.   However, I have watched people with cancer...and other battles for life...for breath...told they have days to live...who seem to live life with hmmm...aspiration...with each breath...with purpose...because they did not know when their last day would be.   

And here we have been given opportunity to be close with those we love.   We are allowed to continue to communicate in a way many of us usually do on our phones...computers...yet now we long for face to face...for hugs...for sharing a meal...and maybe the bigger question is are we thankful?   Are we living as such that if this were the day...would we be ready?   I came across an old sunrise picture from days gone by that I had added words and just spoke to me...

And so a new day...today that green grass had covered with white...but the storm has passed for now.   I think of an old Jessie Coulter song (she married to Waylon Jennings...okay maybe you don't remember...) But it was storms never last do they baby...and this one of those storms...so hang on and keep your faith...love your people...and try not to worry...so with that said I say good night...and thanks for listening in to my rambles and taking a little bike ride...God bless you and keep you!   lyp